Hero

hero...It is not my concern now to analyze the wonderful song by Enrique Iglasuis but i will focus on some points attracted my attention in the song to be the start i go on with ... i can't really describe how much i felt this song ...the most meaningful question he asked in the song " would you die for the one you love ?!!" , really i felt this so much ... i cried alot at the end when he died in front of her eyes.. even when he was hit and she saw that , he was her hero ...even when he died at the end she didn't leave him and she believed he will still be her hero...why all this ?? i asked myself alot...has she beared this only as he asked her to bear or as he asked her to be her hero ?!!!.....- of course, i know the answer-

well , every girl ever can't deny dreaming even for once of a hero ... some girls call him the knight ... whatever... when she met him she may recognize him from the crowd..the point here is that he maynot regard himself as a hero before he met her, but when she chooses him to be so ,he hurries, raising his sword,YES i'm the heroooo,i came from the dark, from this distant part of the world, walking to save you NHAHAHAH... then he begins to behave as a knight ...even if her friends may see him as the most weak ,miserable man ever , "poor our dear friend , where has your mind gone ?!! ... do you see this man as a heroo !!!" .. her friends may say this ......

Yea , she regards him as a hero .... here resides the most exciting part or if i can call it the philosophy, life can be regarded as a puzzle board.. men are regarded as puzzle pieces..each empty space in the puzzle board represents a girl ... each empty space may have more than one piece that fits into ... the problem in Question is to find the most suitable piece...NO, not to find ( as girls don't find men ...they do find us) but to accept the most suitable piece...furthermore, what if that piece doesn't regard itself as suitable ..or doesn't find himself suitable to be a hero for someone ?!!!... how will he be alerted ?? in other words, how will the puzzle space request the puzzle piece to fit into ???.....-i really don't know the answer of this Question-......

actually, I always believe in true or pure feelings as they are the only difference between being a human and being a machine with no sense , just having some stored procedures to be executed in certain situations ..eating,walking,talking,driving...etc. But in addition, i have a strong belief that the difference between a wise polite sensetive girl and a impolite girl resides in her reaction when she finds or she experiences some feelings deeply inside.... I think as we are humans like men we have the right to think ,feel ,express yourself in some way, but we must choose the proper way to express ourselves which appeals to our community and doesn't conflict with our nature as girls ... the proof on this comes from the same philosophy ...the puzzle theory .... if you look once at the puzzle board, you will find that a puzzle piece may have the ability to move freely between puzzle spaces ,but not vice versa .... so i believe that men are actors and we are always reactors... when we try to break the rule , we are trying to revolt against our human nature so we won't ever be able to make it the right way..thanks Allah, i always have a clear limit between what is wrong and what is right to do....i had known a girl in my first year in the faculty - actually it was an unpleasant accompany, thanks Allah i left her,and i'm not going to tell the whole story now,maybe later- she hadn't mind going through a relation whenever she is asked ( sorry for telling such shameful thing )...this is what i call reacting the wrong way...

I've mentioned before that there is no girl with no hero in her dreams, so naturally i had a hero in my dreams...well, if i'm going to describe him a little bit, he doesn't have a white horse or even a fancy car... he doesn't have muscles ( ya333) or behaves like Selvester Stalone... he doesn't look like Tom Cruise..actually, I haven't dreamt of his face,his shape, his look ...and i won't..... I've dreamt of his manners,his personality,being wide-minded , smart , gentleman , knows how to behave or how to deal with a girl , being comforting, helpful , caring.... when being with him ,having the feeling of being at home, being a knight inside himself without ever holding a sword or riding a horse even for once......

I'm not trying to be wise ...i believe i'm not wise at all.. i don't mind walking in the main street eating lollypop...i really like lollypops ... Emille said:" i'm a big big girl in a big big world..it is not a big big thing if you leave me" ... and Ghada says:"i'm a young young girl in a big big world"... so i'm not that big girl...but really these are my thoughts ...

well, now I wanna mention some situations i experienced with my friends or girls i know:

1- once , in my second year in this faculty , there was a friend of us who is a student in the faculty of arts , she wanted to publish a magazine and she wanted to make a reportage with us ...the topic was on :" as a girl,when you feel some kind of love inside...what will you do ?" ... actually ,when she asked me my opinion concerning this topic, i well replied, she told me so....after this i had a conversation with one friend ...we were discussing our opinions .... i said:" i must react well ,wisely if i felt some sort of feelings, i won't tell him or approach him , i will act normally , i won't try to attract his attention".....my friend's answer was a shock for me,she said:" we love Allah , our family,our friends, nothing more" - she didn't believe in the existence of any other kind of love -...then she looked at me up and down then she left me in a hurry as if i was a shameful accompany... but i didn't mind ... i believed that one day she will change her mind and i decided not to talk with her concerning this topic again... this year,two weeks ago , me and the same friend were talking about a series on the TV where the actor and the actress love each other, leading a good life and a good family... the most remarkable two things are: first, i had a similar conversation with the same friend again NahAhahAhahha....... second, she hasn't changed her mind yet !!!!!!

2- another situation, in my third year , i was walking with a friend , we were talking about hero definition or our dreams of him .... i said :" i don't mind where is the apartment , whether he has a car or not , i haven't thought about the wedding or whether there will be a cooker or housekeeper or not" .... she said :" poor ghada, i imagine visiting you after 6 years to find you washing the floor, poor dear friend".... she went on:" i need a housekeeper as i don't know how to cook and i won't bother myself to learn, i need a car , and i need to learn driving ".... ( i said to myself: will you drive the car or your spouse?!!!)...the most exciting part here is that this friend is married now and i think she won't have a housekeeper ......

3-one of the bad memories i ever had, i saw a puzzle piece trying to fit into a puzzle space, really i don't want to remember her reaction , he was saying:" tell me what you want me to be and i will change as you wish " ... he was trying hardly to appeal to her ,he was very miserable...he was if he would sit on his knees .....OH Allah...she embarrassed him alot and in front of us and yelled at him without any mercy: " i don't like you , you are too bad ,too weak, i don't want you ,even if you 've changed ".... i think yes ,he was weak ...but she was very cruel..she over-reacted with the situation...may be he was mistaken in choosing the time,the place to tell her ,maybe he was mistaken to have such a weak appearance in front of her, but i think weakness cannot be received by such cruelty.......

4-a friend of mine, one good guy wanna meet her father to engage her, it is not my concern now whether she accepts or refuses as she behaved politely when he talked to her about the matter.... the point here is how she discussed the matter loudly with herself, she described him :"he is silly to think about this , he is good guy but he is dreaming, how can i accept him ( notice the contrast here).... he will try to dominate and i don't like this...he is so silly ...if he wanna dream ,ok enjoy your dreams that i won't ever share with you" !!!! ... is he silly for just telling her that he loves her !!! ... is he silly for telling:" i'm a human ... i respect my humaneness!!!!"....

I've said before that i'm not trying to wear a wise mask ... but i'm wondering the contrasts i experience... after all , my friends describe me as a silly girl with funny thoughts which won't make me happy ever and i won't reach anything i aspire to ....really, i don't know ....i don't know how i have had the courage to write down all this ,i don't know if this is some sort of silliness, but really i'm comforted as they are my thoughts , this is Ghada from inside .. i believe i have more to say but this is what i can write or think of ,now ....